Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have be thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they get home and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.
This was not practical back then nor is it now. Planning Wednesdays dinner Tuesday night is for chefs, unless you're a chef devising a dinner plan 5 minutes prior to when you are hungry is completely acceptable. You can just as easily let a man know you are concerned about his needs by asking. You aren't his mother and "hey babe- I missed you how was your day" should suffice. Anything further is smothering. If he looks particulary "rode rough"- get him a beer or poor him some scotch. While you're at it get yourself a drink too. Only good things can happen from there.
Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.
Wow 15 minutes?? And these should just materialize on the clock like that time you dropped acid and had that tea party in the Lawn and Garden department at Walmart? Here's a tip: Do not look refreshed or fresh-looking. He will only become suspicious that you are getting it from somewhere else, hiding the fact that you just went on a shopping spree or seriously in need of more things to do around the house. Who cares if he has been around work-weary people- you are his work weary wife.
Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
I can surprisingly only agree with this suggestion. Every man will find his wife more interesting if he comes home to her resembling anything closer to gay. This also may be your only chance to befriend and make that hoetorious neighbor useful. Nothing would make him happier than the two of you pawing at each other like two kittens tangled in yarn. How's that for a lift? Literally.
Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Run a dustcloth over the tables.
Again, nothing says "I need more to do" like a clean house. Instead put on a white tank top, sans bra, and some tiny boyshorts then..."What clutter?"
During the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering to his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
I'm sorry...what?...I just vomited.
Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Encourage the children to be quiet.
If it were as easy as encouragement my kids wouldn't talk at all. I have tried everything from encouragement to threats of intense torture. They have no "off" button and frankly if he were to come home to a house of no noise he's assume we'd all been murdered. That's not at all a recipe for comfort.
Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
I almost agree with this, though I forget all the time. Men need their man-cave time. Not that we don't we are just able let it all build up till 1/2 off tequila night. Men cannot. You can wait for him to talk first if you desire, but who are we kidding, there is nothing to gain for either of you. Join him in the man cave in 30 minutes and do your venting while stripping off clothes. He wont be listening but it's only important to hear ourselves speak. It's a win-win
Don't complain if he's late for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through at work.
Any wife has every right to complain about a man who doesn't come home at night if he doesn't call. Unless you married a real playboy I can promise nothing more than cards, booze, and/or bad jokes are happening. Honestly it's no big deal just tell him his basic whereabouts are needed. Furthermore even this information is only needed in situation where you might have to pick him up after the drunken penis wars are over.
Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
Really this is a card I'd only pull out if I desperately need something big. Otherwise you risk scaring him into thinking he's about to have his colon scoped.
Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
I wont even go there about all the ways this is just soul-crushing to any woman. I will just say an honest, intelligent woman will question everything, especially the judgement of a man. If you're married to the earlier mentioned "playboy type" you will qustion his integrity and truthfulness as well.
A good wife always knows her place.
An honest wife knows her place and it's worth, just in case of a divorce.
A special thanks to Good Housekeeping magazine and the 50's ideals for providing us with expectations that cannot be lived up to. May those standards RIP.
Love it!
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